The police

Over the last two or three weeks I have noticed that everywhere I go the police are there.  I drive up the motorway, they are driving, I go to different towns and they are there.  Literally everywhere I go the police are there.

I mentioned this to a friend last week and she said it was just paranoia.  We went down the town, it was a normal quiet Tuesday lunch time.  Everywhere there were police.  She said maybe I wasn't being paranoid.

I went to mass on Saturday night, the police were there in uniform.  It freaked me out.

In my head I've combined the police being everywhere with my paranoia about my past being investigated.  With the high profile moral panic about paedophilia I keep expecting either my father or my time in care to be investigated.  Maybe that's why the police are following me.

I spoke to the cpn this morning about the police following me and she said I was just being paranoid and I had to rationalise it every time I thought about it.  As I left the cmht, there was a police car parked outside.  After lunch I went to an appointment in next town and on my way home I popped into Sainsburys to get some shopping.  There were police there.  I drove home, the police followed me most of the way.  I got home, put my shopping away and there was a knock at the door.  It was the police.  She said she was investigating some vandalism that had happened in my street three weeks ago.  I don't believe her.  I don't believe a) the police bother investigating vandalism and b) they do it three weeks later.  I didn't hear her knocking on the neighbours door either. 

I don't know what she wanted, what she was really checking on.  I wanted to ask her why they keep following me but I didn't want her to think I was mental.  So instead my paranoia is getting worse and worse.  Tomorrow I'm working a late shift and I have to have a police free day or my head will go completely mental.